Transferring a bond between human partners.

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knight76
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Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2007 12:46 am

Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by knight76 »

We own a 7 year old Indian Ringneck and over the years we have both spent time with him but he has seemed to have bonded with me. The issue there is he was bought as a gift for my wife. We spent equal time with him really so I guess he made the choice. If I am sitting near the wife and the bird is on her, he crawls his way over to sit with me.

Can a birds bond with a human be transferred to another? I am guessing this can be done as when a bird is re-homed it will need to develop a new bond with the new owner over time. But it may be more difficult in this case as I will still be in it's life.

How should we approach this? Should I with-hold all affection to Charlie and let the wife spend as much time with him as possible?

Should we be looking to just accept it, possibly buying a new bird for my wife to start bonding with from the beginning?

We have been thinking about adding a second bird to our home, we used to have a cockatiel and the ringneck together until the cockatiel died, he was 17 years old.

Another question, is can you have two ringnecks in the same house successfully? Each only handled by it's owner?

We are also interested in a Hahn Macaw as an option. Really, we are investigating our options here to add a second bird.
Last edited by knight76 on Thu Jul 16, 2015 8:44 am, edited 1 time in total.
sanjays mummi
Posts: 2050
Joined: Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:07 pm
Location: Bedfordshire UK

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by sanjays mummi »

Sanjay was my decision, but when he bonded with my late husband too, I was actually very happy for him to do this. Birds are flock animals, and I haven't read anywhere that the IRN bonds with just one partner for life in its wild state. They are also part of the human family they live with, and as such should be accepted in the same way a cat or dog would, shared affection shared trust. Consider this, if your wife had to spend time away from home, who would it fall to, to feed Charlie? Clean his environment? And spend quality time with Charlie?, your wife is unlikely to trust anyone else but you. I would never introduce another bird into Sanjays happy little world, he would never accept it at his age now,
I watched a programme once about a lady who had been recently widowed, and who now had sole care of her late husbands Macaw, the bird was not only self harming he was refusing to come to her, refusing to accept food from her and was on anti depressants, all because he had been her husbands bird, whom she had Never taken any share in caring for him, you could be buying into future problems by trying to disassociate yourself from Charlies life,
knight76
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2007 12:46 am

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by knight76 »

I do agree that it would be hard on Charlie to just have my wife take over to ensure she bonds with him. It's not like he never goes to her, tonight I was giving him some attention, and he decided he was going to walk between out lounge chairs and say hello to Karen (wife), and sat with her for a time, then came back.

I don't think there is a big issue introducing a new bird to the house from a ruining his world perspective, he may enjoy having a feathered bird around, though, they won't be in the same cages though of course.

Karen does say she is happy for Charlie to be both of ours as long as he goes to both and doesn't just ignore her, I guess I just feel guilty when he snubs her considering he was a xmas gift for her.

We are really settling on a hahn macaw as the bird to add to the household. Can anybody say these two species do not and should not go together a a rule? Bearing in mind their interaction between them would be minimal.
InTheAir
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Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2013 4:24 pm

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by InTheAir »

In regards to forming bonds, it sounds like you both have quite a good relationship with the Charlie :)
I am the unfavoured one with Nila, but I spend a lot of time training him tricks and do most of the day to day care, so we have a really good relationship anyway. In fact, he usually does as I ask whereas he will sit on my boyfriends shoulder till the cows come home but not necessarily do what Dave asks him.
I think there is still room to have a fulfilling relationship without being the chosen one. It is about accepting and developing what you have. Sometime i think my ringnecks are teaching me to be a zen buddist!
I am also not the choosen one with my hen, Sapphire, either. Nila is. But I did choose to get a parent raised bird, so I was never expecting to be. She also trusts me and we have fun together. I think she might like me more than she likes my boyfriend, if not likes definitely trusts.

Getting another bird won't guarantee that it will like your wife best. It may even take the first birds lead. Or it may live up to your expectations.

Indian ringnecks are flock creatures, as are most parrots. There is a pretty good chance that your bird my like having a buddy, if it is introduced slowly and carefully. I see you are leaning towards a hahns, but if you get an irn GET A MALE! You will thank me later ;) 2 males are quite likely to get on well and it is less pressure on everyone over breeding season, especially Charlie if he is quite humanised. Nila was a year old when we got Sapph and they have had some teething trouble. Nila still hasn't figured out how to do girl-boy interactions properly which frustrates Sapphire at times.
We can't cage them together for Nilas safety. Nila gets on quite well with our friend's male birds.

I don't know anything about hahns macaws, except they look quite cute. Sorry I'm no help there.
MissK
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Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 3:46 pm
Location: Baltimore, Maryland, U.S.A.

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by MissK »

Hi. I can't really speak about how Charlie would do in various situations, but I can relate what went down with my bird, Rocky. I picked him up at 10 years old from the home of his first family. They were three women and a man, with another man deceased. I don't know who he favoured there, but when I brought him to the vet the next day, that vet ( a man) said "Oh, he likes men!" "Tough tuna", I was thinking, because there are no men in my house.

I feel Rocky made excellent progress with me, and I think we're happy with each other. Over time I introduced him to a few different birds of different species and eventually got him a Budgie, who he liked quite a bit. Rocky seemed pleased to see every bird I brought near him.

In time, I brought home a second male Ringneck. There was no lack of harmony between them. They were instantly thrilled with each other in a way Rocky had never been thrilled with other birds he met. The female Budgie was immediately supplanted by the new male IRN. This was from the moment I brought Sinbad home. After, what, 8 months or so I started testing to see if they might like to share a cage. They were interested in it, but there were some false starts. However, in less than a year from the time Sinbad came with us, they were living together and seeming quite happy about it. I think the hesitation was more about learning to share space than dissatisfaction with the company.

What I feel can be learned from this is that MY bird appeared to have no lasting trouble in transferring his acceptance to me. I don't feel he has a close bond with me that is expressed physically, but it is equally true I am not asking him for a literally hands on relationship. He seeks my company unless I am competing with the other bird, and I place that in the WIN column. It would seem that for MY bird, changing humans is not a huge problem.

Additionally, I can say without reservation that MY bird prefers the company of a conspecific to that of other species. It just makes sense to me - these are social animals; why would they not prefer the company of their own kind?

If I were to offer advice about selecting a second bird, I would lean strongly towards pairing two male Ringnecks. I know little about the likes of the Hahn's Macaw specifically, but I know some other macaws choose to flock together with their own kind in the wild. I would urge you to consider how the pairing would affect each of the birds, not only with regards to how they might tolerate each other, but what they might prefer, and how that preference might play out in the home. You might find you want two IRNs, to hedge bets on making their social lives the most fulfilling they can be. Or you might decide that your preference for having a bird primarily bonded with you is more important. You should not forget that it is the bird who (again) will be making the choices.

I realize this posting is not my tightest work, but it is rather late where I am. Take whatever you can from our story.
-MissK
emilynbluey
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Jul 20, 2015 7:51 pm

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by emilynbluey »

Before my partner started working,our ringneck loved him more than me. Then when he started work. The tables turned.

Because it was just me and my ringneck hone together, we got closer and started developing a relationship. Were a lot closer now.
farrukhnawaz
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Jan 03, 2017 10:39 am

Re: Transferring a bond between human partners.

Post by farrukhnawaz »

Yeh We can't cage them together for Nilas safety. Nila gets on quite well with our friend's male birds.
We realize this posting is not my tightest work, but it is rather late where I am. Take whatever you can from our story.
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