How long did it take you and your irn to bond?

[Caitrose96]

Hi there,
I have a one year old untamed IRN who I've had for about 3-4 weeks now. I've taught him heaps of tricks and he happily climbs onto my finger when I ask and eats treats out of my hand. However he still likes his play gyms and various other perches more than he likes me. He will never sit on me for very long and I was wondering if anyone could tell me how long it took yo and your bird to bond and if you could give me some tips.

[ellieelectrons]

To be honest, I've had Janey for almost 5 years and Charlie for almost 4 years and the bond is continually growing and changing. There will be some rough patches but it will keep growing and if continue to be patient as you have been, your bird will want to spend more time with you.

Ellie.

[Jen&Bug]

I've had Bug for five years and I would say we've bonded Bug was only just weaned when I got him, so it took a few months for the bond to develop, as he was still getting his head around the whole business of being a bird. It was lovely watching his confidence grow, and have him reveal his personality to us gradually over time.

I definitely agree with Elly that the bond changes over time. Just like anyone you live with for a while, there are times when you feel like you're more or less on the same page, and times when it feels like you're from different planets (I'm sure Bug thinks that about me sometimes too). The strength of the bond is that you both keep trying to figure each other out.

Something for you to figure out about your little guy is how he's going to express his 'bondedness' with you. Like many IRNs, Bug isn't a snuggly bird, and is usually happier exploring the room and getting into mischief than staying close by me. The reason I know we've bonded is that he checks in from time to time to see what I'm doing (even when there's not food involved!), and if I go to another room he'll eventually come and find me.

In contrast, my sun conure is extremely snuggly, and expresses his bond by staying as close to me as he can (often down the front of my shirt). This kind of bond has advantages in making you feel very loved and important, but significant disadvantages if you want some space to yourself! Given that your bird will hopefully be in your life for the next 20+ years, there's a lot to be said for a bird who's happy to entertain itself.

If you've managed to teach him tricks I'd say the bond might already be there...sounds like you're doing a great job.

[sanjays mummi]

Bonded?, don't make me laugh!, Sanjay kisses me one minute and tries to savage me the next.

[MissK]

This is interesting for me. I have to ask myself first what criteria must be met to consider bonding to have taken place. For me, I think, evidence a bond (of whatever measure) is displayed when one is emotionally affected by the coming and going of the other, and when one anticipates with emotion the arrival or departure of the other. There is also commonly a component of concern with the other's well being and emotional state aka "Love". I could probably argue a case for the existence of a negative and positive bond as well.

Simply put, I'm glad to see Rocky, sorry to leave him, and I'm concerned about his welfare. From time to time I do miss him enough to haul my lazy butt out of bed for a special visit. If this is bonding, it happened for me on the ride home from picking him up.

How does he feel about me? He certainly reacts to my arrival with positive interest, and he sometimes calls for me when I'm not there. I don't think he usually notes my departure, but he definitely calls after me sometimes as I go. I think I might say bonding for Rocky was evident at the time he started calling for me when I was out of the room. I have only the most casual of memory to go on, but I think this started 4 or 5 months after I brought him home.

These are my thoughts on the matter.

-MissK

[InTheAir]

It depends, like missk said, on how you define bond.
I think the important thing is to be realistic about what kind of bond you want and what kind of bond your bird wants.

When we got Nila he would step up happily from his cage, play with us for a few minutes then fly to a curtain rail and watch us. We put toys there for him and let him do his thing. After spending a week mostly hanging out there he started to fly down and play with us more. We encouraged him with treats and toys whenever he joined us.
It soon got to the point where he was all over us all the time and we couldn't have personal space when he was loose. He also wouldn't play independently, even right next to us. We had to be involved.
We made hanging play gyms with more toys and put treats there. We rewarded him randomly when he did his own thing or stayed on his perches.
Now we have a happy medium, where he is comfortable with us and can play by himself if we are being boring...mostly

I can't say what his opinion on the bond is, he is shows a preference for my boyfriend, he is good with me and will fly to land on people he has met a few times. He takes a while to warm to strangers in the house, but will play with them if they behave the way he likes. He calls both myself and my boyfriend if we are out of sight, but he will stop calling when either one of us comes back.
After living with him for about 9 months I think the relationship is still developing.